How to heal your Inner self

Inner wounds are undealt with internal issues that are a result of psychological and emotional things or call them experiences that we have encountered in the past.

Maybe you were molested as a child. Maybe you didn’t receive love and affection growing up. Maybe someone you trusted betrayed you. Maybe someone broke your heart. Maybe you were mistreated.

It’s a long list of maybes as each individual has their own unique experiences.

Inner wounds are a topic quite few people are well versed with. And some even confuse them with emotional wounds, but the two are very different.

Inner wounds develop as a result of painful emotional and mental experiences we have.

And they usually portray themselves in our behaviors.

They usually have their origin in our development stages especially childhood but can also come about as a result of other unpleasant experiences we’ve been through in adulthood either with a spouse, partner, friends, girlfriend or boyfriend, partner, parents and many more.

It’s the unpleasant things they did to us that caused these inner wounds. We then tend to build walls around ourselves, as a copying mechanism, because of the painful experiences we once went through.

That hurt then tends to alter our behavior and personality if we don’t let it go.

How do you know you or someone else needs inner healing ?

Ever wondered why someone or some people behave in a not so normal way, like something about a certain area of their life just doesn’t feel right?

Maybe they have serious trust issues, or are very quarrelsome, stubborn, too quiet, too loud, reserved etc. It’s a really long list that i will get back to later.

All these behaviors are a manifestation of inner wounds.

One thing is sure, WE ALL HAVE INNER WOUNDS that need inner healing. Thou some more than others. We have all faced some challenges at one point or another in our lives that has altered our behavior or caused us to act the way we do.

You can know an emotionally damaged person by the way they behave. Their negative behaviors and traits are in extremes. That shows you that they (or you) have some inner wounds that you need to dress and take care of so they can heal and you can enjoy a happier, healthier and more fulfilling life.

How do inner wounds develop?

Once something bad happens to you and hurts you and you don’t deal with it, it remains in your head and heart and starts to torment you from the inside, that’s how these wounds develop.

That inner wound then starts to spread to other areas of your life and will show itself in your behavior and how you relate with others. If left unchecked it will go on to spread to your relationships, work life, and all your dealings. The more it spreads, the more it soils wherever it goes.

Take the example of a physical wound. Once you don’t take care to treat it, keep it clean and dressed and give it the necessary care it deserves to heal, it will only worsen and spread to other parts. Same applies to an inner wound.

Let’s say for example maybe growing up your mum or dad always quarreled at you for small mistakes and you grew up to be quarrelsome as well. That trait will cause people to dislike you and will ruin most of your relationships as no one loves to be around an unreasonably quarrelsome person.

Or maybe you are gloomy most of the time (because someone did something that deeply hurt you or you had a difficult childhood and that has caused you to be bitter), you will find you have less friends because everyone is going through something hard and troubling and the last thing they would want is someone who makes it worse on them.

Behaviors that are a manifestation of inner wounds.

NB; These behaviors in themselves are just behaviors but once they go to extremes then they are an indicator of something internal you need to deal with before it destroys you. They include;

• Not believing in anyone.( Maybe someone you trusted broke your heart or someone who said would always be there left, etc.)
• Rebelliousness( someone could have hurt you and this is your way of hurting them back, or maybe you have not recovered from having controlling parents)
• Judging others harshly (maybe You don’t feel enough and therefore take it out on others)
• Hating others for no reason ( Maybe the same was done to you or someone hurt you so badly )
• Jealousy (maybe You feel others shouldn’t be better than you or don’t deserve good things)
• Always criticizing (Deep down you don’t feel good enough and so others can’t be too)
• Stubbornness (It could just be your way of coping with whatever your trying to hide from.)
• Love of loneliness (maybe you feel other people don’t understand you)
• Crying over very small issues ( Maybe there’s something bigger that’s the real reason behind your break downs)
• Rejection( someone may have rejected you or told you that you aren’t good enough, your un attractive, dense, etc.)
• A life of indifference, no attachment to anyone or anything ( someone could have abandoned you)
• Not looking people in the face when they are talking to you. ( You could be embarrassed or hurting over some painful experience you encountered)
• Singing in the bathroom ( maybe you can’t stand being alone with your thoughts)
• Cracking jokes and laughing in a loud tone.
• Some people don’t laugh or even smile even when the funniest joke is made.
• Drinking too much
• Speaking in too loud a tone.

These are some of the behaviors but there are many more, each individual has some unique to themselves. Once you find out what yours are and the root causes, you can be well on your way to a happier and more fulfilling life.

What happens if you don’t heal your inner self?

Just like physical wounds, if left untreated and not dressed for recovery worsen, same applies to inner wounds. You can ignore them all you like, until you can’t ignore them anymore. Here are some effects of inner wounds;

1. Difficulty in dealing with others.
2. Depression
3. Isolation from others
4. Poor communication skills leading to strained relationships
5. Difficulty to maintain relationships
6. Difficulty in making friends.
7. Sleeping disorders
8. Reduced immunity and health retardation

How to heal your inner self?

They say time heals but time just teaches you how to cope with the situation.

You need to make a deliberate effort to heal your inner self. Decide to work on those issues. That it the best way to go. Making a deliberate effort to become a better person.

No it’s not going to be easy. It’s going to be hard but i promise you one thing, it surely does get better. Your going have to make the decision every single day to be better.

You may need to go into counselling. Maybe you need to meditate more or start meditating if you haven’t been doing so, maybe you need to forgive that wrong that was done to you and let go. It’s a long list. Find out what it is you need to do, that will work for you best and do that. You’ll be glad you did.

Do it for yourself first and do it for your loved ones.

Closing note

This blog is centered around helping you become the best version of yourself and lead a happier and more fulfilling life.

Browse around for articles on how to forgive, meditate, find your life purpose, heal from your life’s heart ache, cheer up , move on and so many more.

We all have inner wounds, as we’ve all faced some hurtful situations, but that’s no excuse for becoming a bitter person. Everyone is fighting a battle of some kind and the best we can do is not bleed on them with your wounds. Heal your inner self so that others that have to suffer as a result of your self-negligence.

And we wish you the very best on your journey. Sending you lots of love.